Crispy Gamer

Th1s H4s 7o St0p! Sensible Game Numbering NOW!


People, people, people! Did we learn nothing from Driv3r? The conventional wisdom says that game recieved a critical drubbing because of a buggy engine, lackluster combat and ridiculous AI. But I'd argue that the low review scores were just a collective, subconscious reaction to game's obnoxious, use-a-number-to-replace-a-letter naming scheme.

It was hard to get too worked up about this when it was just a single, isolated naming incident. But then comes today's official announcement of a sequel to Thief 3 named, no, not Thief 4 but Thi4f.

Look at that logo up there. That's an official logo! What has become of the English language? What has become of our self respect as a species? Why won't these darn kids get off my lawn?

The most galling part of Thi4f's nonsensical ressurection of a horrible naming convention is that doesn't even make sense in context. In traditional leetspeak (yes I know how stupid those two words sound together), a "4" is used to replace the letter  "A." So are they trying to respell the series as "Thiaf" now? Or have the rules just been thrown out and we can just replace any vowel with any number at this point? What's next? Tekk6n? BioSh2ck? Heck, let's start doing it for old games! Resident 4vil. Grand ThIVft Auto. Super Mar64o.

If you're as tired of this backsliding as I am, come join me in establishing the Sensible Numbering In Games group (SNIG). We'll start small, organizing protests against Leetspeak numbering and the occasional overuse of roman numerals, but as we grow I see us organizing and taking action against a whole range of game naming misdeeds, including overly long and/or unecessary subtitles (Star Wars: Rogue Squadron II: Rogue Leader, I'm looking at you), numbering resets (Bionic Commando was an NES game, not an Xbox 360 game!) and the overuse of DS as a portable game naming suffix (Special exemption: CrossWorDS).

Are you with me? If so, lend me your voice (and your most egregious game naming atrocities) in the comments!