(Page 1 of 3)
Developer: Sumo Handheld
Publisher: Konami
Release Date: July 22, 2008
System: Nintendo DS
ESRB Rating: E10+
Official Web Site
0:00 The thick of the Beijing Olympics seems the perfect time to try this modern, portable retread of a button-mashing arcade classic.
0:01 An X-TREME sounding-announcer announces the title of the game. On the bottom screen, some extremely big-headed, big-eyed characters compete in hurdles, javelin, running, etc. They all seem stereotypical in some way, from the huge Afro on the black runner to the hair streaks on the "goth."
0:02 "Welcome to New International Track and Field. I am the referee and I will be your guide." The music is a light techno remix of the
Chariots of Fire theme. Nice!
0:03 I can choose my nationality from 60 options! Part of me wants to claim to be from Luxembourg, but Olympic fever has got my patriotism levels up. U-S-A! U-S-A!
0:05 I can only choose an Easy Career mode to start. Lame! What if I'm an Olympic-caliber button masher already?
0:06 Some of these character designs are truly frightening. I'm particularly scared of Helga, who the game describes as a "misshapen she-beast" who "recently emerged from a cave-dwelling life of exile in Eastern Europe." The fact that they put this much thought into the backstories (and the fact that I care) also scares me. I end up choosing California pretty-boy Dirk because
of his rippling six-pack I'm a proud American. Yeah!
0:08 The 100m sprint involves rubbing the stylus back and forth along the bottom of the touch-screen as fast as possible. I false-start my first attempt because I didn't know there was a starting gun. On the second attempt, I do the opposite of a false start, getting off to a light jog instead of a sprint. I still pass the opponents easily as I get up to speed. Despite my slow start, I finish in 13:859, well under the 20 second "qualifying time."
0:11 The long jump is next. More sprinting, then I have to tap and hold a touch-screen target to set my jumping angle. This sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
0:12 No disaster. On my first attempt I get a decent 5.793m jump (2m is all I need to qualify). My next two attempts to better the score end up as fouls because I can't seem to get up to speed. Oh, well. I'm still first in my four person group with 5,905 "points."
0:14 The javelin is controlled exactly like the long jump, except this time I'm controlling the angle of throw instead of angle of the jump. Sigh.
0:15 I somehow totally miss the on-screen target with my stylus on my first attempt. On the second try, my angle ends up a little too high and the javelin actually goes into outer space briefly. 55.828. On the third try, my left thumb accidentally sits on the touch screen, screwing up the recognition. Who thought touch-screen controls were a good idea here? Despite this crappiness, I still qualified, but I'm down to second in the group standings.
0:17 On the hurdles, the game keeps thinking I'm pressing the on-screen jump button I'm decidedly not. By the time I correct for this, I'm well in last place with a 20:711 finishing time. This is STILL under the 22 second qualifying time. I can't fail if I try, here! Down to third in group rankings, though.